How to prepare and enjoy SPAM™ Luncheon Meat
Why SPAM™ Luncheon Meat?
To answer briefly, why not? SPAM™ Luncheon Meat
(henceforth referred to as "SPAM™" for purposes of
brevity, though it should be noted that, according to the official
SPAM™ website, SPAM™ is an adjective and not a noun)
is more than a delicious combination of your favorite meats and
by-products packaged in a tin guaranteed to last through the next
Cold War in your underground bunker; SPAM™ consumption crosses
all georacial, sociopolitical, and econimosexual boundaries to become
an experience enjoyed by all! Remember: it's a tasty treat if you're
into meat!
How can I prepare and enjoy SPAM™?
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Step 1: Wake up
SPAM™ is very palatable early in the morning,
but you shouldn't wake up too early, or your crankiness
will disrupt your enjoyment of the meal.
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Step 2: Put on a happy face
A Positive Mental Attitude™ is a very important part
of your SPAM™ experience!
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Step 3: Obtain SPAM™
Hopefully you have some SPAM™ in your garage or pantry.
Otherwise, you better run to the store and get some!
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Step 4: Open SPAM™
It's not gonna do you much good inside the tin, now is it?
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Step 5: Smell SPAM™
Mmm, smells good!
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Step 6: Put SPAM™ in heated pan
You might want to put some butter or oil in the pan as well.
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Step 7: Cook SPAM™
But don't overcook it!
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Step 8: Call your guests
If you're eating alone, that's okay too. But SPAM™ really
is a group experience.
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Step 9: Serve SPAM™
Sliced, diced, or mashed, SPAM™ tastes great!
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Step 10: Enjoy
Wow, what a treat!
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And the final step...
Step 11: Post-SPAM™ Super Happy Fun Time!!!
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